Once the decision to divorce has been taken, you need to get ready. Preparing for a custody agreement will typically be your number one priority if you have children. While you could look at it as preparing for battle, that won’t help, and it could make reaching an agreement far more complicated than it needs to be.
Here is what you need to realize:
Your marriage is over, and there is no going back
Focusing on the past is what prevents many divorcing couples from moving forward. Maybe you feel you have good reason to be annoyed with your spouse. Perhaps they were a lousy or unfaithful partner. Maybe they were lazy or useless with money. Yet you cannot change the past. Getting angry about things that have already happened is a waste of time and energy.
You need to make decisions in the best interests of your kids
It can be extremely hard to forget how much you dislike your spouse right now and focus on doing what is best for your child, yet you must. Trying to punish your spouse by restricting the amount of custody they get will hurt your child most of all. They need you both, and they are entitled to spend time with you both. So unless your spouse poses a real threat to your child’s wellbeing, accept that your child wants and needs them in their life.
If you have questions about how child custody works, seek legal help to get accurate answers and start planning your divorce strategy. One that works for you and your child.