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4 tips on child custody matters in high-conflict divorce

A contentious divorce complicates so many matters among separating couples. The fight over assets multiplies. Disagreements about alimony turn prickly. And issues related to children – child support and especially child custody – can turn excessively combative.

Sometimes, an unnecessary and harmful tug-of-war pits one parent against the other in child custody situations. As reluctant participants, the children get pulled in directions that may lead to permanent scars. They watch in disbelief in a no-holds-barred battle between two people whom they love. How can certain couples avoid this scenario?

Children take center stage

How do you convince arguing parents to be on proper behavior in child custody battles? Simple. The key word “child” must come to the forefront. The children remain the priority for both parents.

In cases of high-conflict divorce, please keep these points in mind when faced with difficult negotiations related to child support:

  • Focus on the children: Always think about what is best for them. And seeing excessive fighting between their parents is not among the best things for them. Understand that divorce may affect the children’s emotional well-being. Taking the high road may be necessary when confronted with an angry and vengeful spouse.
  • Self-preservation is essential: You must protect yourself. Do your best to ignore the angry and hurtful actions of your estranged spouse. Set firm boundaries and make sure to avoid any one-on-one meetings with him or her. If you must meet to discuss matters, do so in a public place and accompanied by another person.
  • Face the challenge of creating a parenting plan: Where do you find cooperation from an uncooperative parent? In such instances, you likely must work with your attorney or a mediator in finding an effective agreement pertaining to child custody and visitation.
  • Consult with an assertive and compassionate attorney: Crucial insight and advice from an experienced legal advocate is essential in high-conflict divorce scenarios. An attorney will provide parenting plan options – one of which will ultimately be the answer.

A number of obstacles likely will surface in a contentious divorce. Following these tips may help you regarding the issue of child custody.

Patience and compromise

A battle among parents is unfair to the children. They love both parents, but when they see negative behavior surfacing between the adults, the children are torn, confused and hurt. A workable parenting plan is possible, but it may take a great amount of patience and compromise.